Thursday, December 22, 2005

Greetings from the Floor

Here I am, coming to you live from the floor of a friend's apartment in Bethel, Alaska.

Actually, I'm in a chair at a computer, but I'm sleeping on the floor tonight, and was doing so until just a few minutes ago when I woke up incredibly thirsty and, strangely, no longer sleepy.

I realize that I have been throwing a lot of really short entries out there... and no pictures. Let's just say I'm busy and will try harder in the new year, 'k? Tomorrow I fly to Anchorage, where I will be boarding a direct flight from Anchorage to Maui to hang out in the balmy tropical goodness with the family. This is a good thing. And since I will probably not be posting AT ALL from Hawaii, I'm going to give you my inane reflections on the earthy revolution-based time-measuring unit number 2005. Take them for what they're worth, and if you are offended by the phrase "poop factory," please move along:
  1. Life is good. Just kind of in general. I can recall times in the not-so-recent past when I did not think life was so good... but I'm happy to say with great certainty that it is.
  2. If something makes you happy (deep-down happy, not just momentarily, superficially happy), it's probably a good thing. Stop thinking and go with it.
  3. Kindergarteners are a lot smarter than people give them credit for.
  4. Don't worry so much about what other people think. Showing off or doing things just for applause from others is for the insecure. Just when you think you're pretty damn smart or cool or funny or whatever, you have to carry a bucket of your own waste out to a hopper filled with other people's similar waste. Then you realize: no matter how extraordinary you think you are, you're just a poop factory like everyone else.
  5. Remember when your teacher reprimanded you for making those farty noises with your hand and armpit? Rest assured that he/she was probably laughing on the inside. Same for the time you tried out that new word your uncle/cousin/older brother taught you but said not to use in front of adults. Same for the time you sat on another student's lap during recess and passed gas on purpose.
  6. Don't expect everyone around you to do a good job. Some people just don't care about their work, but that's no excuse for not doing a good job yourself.
  7. For Chrissake, ask for help if you need it.
  8. Routine is not necessarily boring. I crave certain routines... waking up with someone, doing my daily work, then coming home to a normal, "us" evening. Nothing special... just living out life like the billions of other poop factories on this planet. Appreciate what you've got; the day-to-day stuff is where the magic lies... I think.
  9. You wouldn't believe the parts of fish that are edible.
  10. Open your heart. F#%* it. It may be a little dangerous, but it's pretty rewarding.

I promise... I will have pictures upon my return from Hawaii. I got a new memory card for the fancy new camera... so I can take more than seven pictures without having to stop and upload them to my computer (which is good since I'm leaving it behind in Alaska).

Good News, Boys and Girls

Yesterday was winter solstice.

That means today there is just a little more daylight than yesterday.

You may now return to your regularly scheduled broadcasting.

Monday, December 19, 2005

It's Over

I updated my iPod, and it now has solitaire on it.

My days of semi-productivity are over.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

It's Amazing What 14 Hours of Sleep can Do

Seriously... 14 hours of sleep is a good answer to most health issues.

I was sick. Then I went to bed at 5:30pm and work up at 7:30am. Now I feel a lot better.

Like magic, it is.

Sunday, December 11, 2005

I Seem to be More a Student than a Teacher

That's right, I'm thinking about MORE schooling.

Not quitting my job and going back to school, mind you. I like my job, in addition to the income it provides.

I've decided that I might want to be a regular classroom teacher, instead of (or rather, in addition to) an ESL teacher. But fear not, gentle reader, I've found a few distance education programs that I'm looking into. I won't be a poor college student again. I refuse.

I think my parents might refuse, too.

Friday, December 09, 2005


The post office is open once again.

You may resume the sending of lavish gifts and envelopes full of unmarked bills.

Thursday, December 08, 2005


Our post office is closed.

That's right ladies and gentlmen. Come rain or sleet or snow or whathaveyou... they deliver mail. Well, they don't deliver, but they, you know, let us get our mail and stuff.

But a few high school aged criminals with crowbars can bring the whole thing to a grinding halt.

Last week, there was a mass break-in across town. All the stores and the Post Office/village offices (they share a building) were broken into. Lots of cash was stolen. Suspects are in custody, so done deal, right?


You see, when a U.S. Post Office gets broken into, they have to close and have a formal investigation by the Postal Inspectors or something like that.

So no mail in, no mail out. Christmas presents are piling up inside the post office. Luck for me I didn't use my credit card last month and don't carry over a balance, because bill-due-date has come and gone... I know I MUST have a phone bill waiting for me in my PO Box, but I can't get to it.

Oh well...

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Slightly Inappropriate

Apparently this is something that needed saying in posterboard medium.

They didn't hold this one up at the airport, though... Bethel is a bit conservative in that sense.

Silly girls.

Silly, silly girls

You like the pink poncho? I found it at a thrift store fo $2.00.

Saturday, December 03, 2005

Good Friends: Good to Have

You know how sometimes you just realize you're lucky?

I walked into the Alaska Air terminal in Bethel this morning, fresh off a flight that had me awake at 4am to be at the airport with the boss (I'll publish a graphic description of "traveling with the boss" later on). I was not at my sunshiney best, honestly. I'll admit this.

So I walk into the terminal from the dark -20 degree morning and who is waiting for me but five of my friends, holding a "Smac's Getting Hitched" sign and some balloons! There was also something written on the back, but it is highly inappropriate for the G-rated family content I strive to maintain on this site.

My day got a whole lot better!

Apparently I'm getting an engagement party! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Thursday, December 01, 2005

I *heart* Copying...

I thought this was a good idea, so I'm going to steal it.

Basically, it's fun to think about what you'd tell yourself in an e-mail if you could send one back in time. Before I start, let me say that I'm fairly happy with how my life turned out, but there are always those little things... So here goes...

1 year ago (age 25)- Breathe. Relax. Don't close yourself off.

5 years ago (age 20)- College will end soon. You'll deal with a whole lotta lot after you graduate and before you settle down in a place you can't even imagine right now. And you'll learn from it all. Life can teach you more than school.

10 years ago (age 16)- Drop choir and take some random free high school electives... this is your last chance for a free education, and you'll have a lot more fun if you diversify a bit. Lift weights, it'll really improve your swimming, but don't stress out if it doesn't. High school boys are dumb, don't blame them for it... it's like blaming a dog for peeing on a hydrant.

15 years ago (age 11)- You will not be an ungainly girl with too-short pants and fickle friends forever. Just ride it out, they're called the awkward years for a reason. Being an adult in the real world is nowhere near as harsh as being a socially uncomfortable kid in an excessively popularity- and fashion-oriented sixth grade class. Don't listen to anyone who tells you you read too much. If you don't like New Kids on the Block, don't listen to them, even if a bunch of silly girls say they won't be your friend if you don't like their music.

20 years ago (age 6)- Don't settle for the "middle" reading group when you know you can read better than most of the kids in the "high" reading group... throw a fit while you're still young enough to throw really good ones! Don't eat the school green beans, they will make you vomit. Hug your grandparents. Don't surf in the wagon on the cement floor of the garage just because you're bored... you'll fall, bust something in your nose, and have a few years' worth of random bloody noses to show for it.

OK, So, Funny Story...

I feel like I've personally notified everyone I need to personally notify (and if I missed someone, I'm very very very very very very sorry).

I'm engaged.

Thank you and good night. :-D