Ah, Memories

For some unknown reason, I started waxing nostalgic this evening. I started thinking about the strangest stuff. Good stuff, from childhood. I pulled a few lessons from these memories:

1. All parents should play a game called Giggles with their children. There are very few rules in the game of Giggles. It's a cross between tickling and professional wrestling. It goes as follows: Parent tickles child. Child tries to get away. Parent does not let child get away. Child shrieks as he/she is pulled back. I said there are FEW rules, but there are TWO rules: 1. No giggles near breakables, and 2. No giggles right after dinner; vomit is bad for the carpet.

2. It's not cruelty if your little sister asks, nay, BEGS to be dragged up the stairs in the bottom of a sleeping bag.

3. Water, Liquid Dial, toothpaste and shampoo mixed into an old film container does NOT make a "super cleaner" than can be used to wash hands, brush teeth, and wash hair. I know, I know, it seems like a good idea. But no need to try this for yourself; I did the research as a seven year-old... although I never got around to trying it on my hair. As a toothpaste, it fails on taste alone.

4. If you're going to go skinny dipping, DON'T let anyone take a picture of your bare self in an inflatable boat.

5. Sometimes it's better to do your own thing. While you may THINK that dressing up alike makes you cool, when that means wearing athletic shorts, tank tops, Rainbow Brite caps, and suede ankle boots, you're better off asserting your individuality.

6. Nothing beats an inflatable pool on a hot summer's day. Unless someone throws your aunt in and busts the sides. Then your sister cries because her pool is broken and the day kind of sucks.

7. If you eat your sister's birthday cookie while she is in the hospital with a concussion, she will keep bringing it up well into adulthood. So just resist the urge to mow down and save yourself years of whining.

8. If a boy sits next to you on the kindergarten bus and asks if you want to play with his He-Man dolls... er... action figures, RUN AWAY, because he's about to kiss you.

9. Ice cream is best if you stir it.

10. Used wrapping paper tubes make good light sabers. First, you go down into the basement and smack each other around with them. Then you sit in aforementioned basement and try to move stuff with your mind. It'll keep you busy and out of your parents' hair for a while.