Happy Presidents' Day

My students don't "get" Presidents' Day. We still have school, and they hardly even know what a president is. Did any of us, really, in first grade?

Anyway, another dandy conversation with the same first grade boys as the "Tomgirl" conversation---

Child #1: What's that say on today on the calendar?

Teacher: Presidents' day. Do any of you know what a president it?

Child #2: George Washington! We put a George Washington on our calendar in our class today!

Teacher: Good! George Washington was a president. Do you know what a president is?

*silence*

*crickets*

Teacher: Do you know how big Alaska is?

Children: *point to map* THAT BIG!

Teacher: Good, the president is the man in charge of Alaska, and Wisconsin, and Minnesota, and California, and New York City, and Hawaii, and all these other places. He's the boss of them all.

Child #2: And Eek too?

Child #4: And Quinhagak? And Bethel?

Teacher: Yes, those are in Alaska. The president is in charge of Alaska, so he's in charge of Quinhagak and Eek and Bethel. And today is Presidents' Day!

Child #3: What do we do on Presidents' Day?

Child #1: We go to Gym!

Teacher: *flapping jaw helplessly*

Child #2: And ELD! We go to ELD!

Child #4: And library. Today is library day.

Teacher: Anyhoo... let's look at the book we're going to read today. What kind of animals are those on the cover? GOOD! That's a mouse, and remember, when we have two of them, we don't say mouses... we say...

Child #1: RATS!

It's a wonder all teachers aren't rendered completely catatonic by the end of a standard work day.